Skip to main content

Day 28: Language is important

It's raining. I wanted to go for a walk but it's really coming down. So I decided to listen to a podcast !

So while listening to this podcast on the Hawaiian language, and people who are trying to revitalize the language and keep it from extinction, I thought of myself. 

I thought of this Who are you? activity I did with my colleagues on Thursday. I thought about all the things that make me, me.  

I thought of all the things I am and all the things I am not. 

This week, I was confronted with another I am.

I am a Puerto Rican who does not speak Spanish. People, a lot of people, look at me and hear my name and assume that I speak Spanish But I do not. 

My mom speaks Spanish and my father spoke Spanish and so does my grandmother but I do not.  And that has always been confusing to me and to everyone around me. 

And I know why I won't and don't speak Spanish. When I was younger I would try to speak in spanish. The words would swirl in my head. It felt so simple flowing in my ears but as soon as I opened my lips and moved my month and tongue the words no longer sounded beautiful. They sounded broken and stuttered. My family would tell me I sounded like a gringa and laugh. It was the worst and my hurt sunk and I gave up. 

Over the years, I've tried over and over but I always stop and give up. 

Embarrassed about my accent. 

Embarrassed that the verbs and other words don't flow. 

But I think that listening to the podcast today might have inspired me to try again. 

Let's see.











Comments

  1. Well this is just beautiful. So human and personal and real. Half the battle is always being able to track and root out our issues and you have it pegged well. I think you can do it and I think you should. If you want to. For you. Thank you for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. >But I think that listening to the podcast today might have inspired me to try again. <

    Sometimes, our inspiration comes when we least expect it. Allowing yourself to listen, to think about who you are and what you want is a wonderful gift for yourself! The fact that you are willing to give it another try speaks volumes about you as a person.

    Thank you for sharing this quite personal slice with us today! :)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What could it be?

Your gift is downstairs!  That's what the text said.  He had mentioned this gift a few times.  He was dropping hints for the last few weeks.  But I didn't think too much about it.  He is a great gifter, gift giver, I don't know what it's called.  Anyway, he is my husband and he loves to give. No holiday or special occasion needed.  I went to the lobby. There were no packages on the shelf.  The mailperson was there so asked if he had it.   " Don't remember seeing your name" he said. He walked a box of packages over to the shelf. On the very bottom was the package. I was in a medium sized white box.  I tried to see the label but I left my glasses upstairs.  I squinted really hard.   CLARK! He got me Clarkpads!  I ran to the apartment and video called him.  Clarkpads!   Then I opened the box and they were purple.   These might not mean anything to the average person. But this is huge.  Some people learned to cook during The Lockdown. We learned ho

Day 3 Who am I?

We always read Winn Dixie. I love the part when Opal asks the preacher to share 10 things about her Mama because she is 10.  I am 45. 45 is a BIG number.   I was going to share 45 things about myself  but I think I'll  add the digits.  9 is more reasonable.   So here are nine things about me and my life. 1. I am a native New Yorker born and raised in Manhattan.  2. I'm right ✋ handed.  3. I'm a former runner. I ran over 30 races after my 40th birthday.  4. I am a bulldog mom. My baby is Bella. You will hear a lot about Bella.  5. I am a wife,  mom, stepmom and grandmother. 6. I love the outdoors! 7. A perfect date with my husband would be cruising on our electric unicycles through the city.  8. I get to teach some pretty cool kids.  9. I'm an omnivert. I can be the quietest or loudest person in the room. 

Ouch!

Those are my toes.  The blue covers, the not so cute, feet that used to be my friends.  If I wanted to run. I ran.  If I  wanted to jump and they would obediently jump.  But now they sting like lightning when ever they begin to zoom.  So, here I am, sitting, chatting, reminiscing about the feet I used to have.  Hopeful for the feet I might have soon. To be continued...